holy fucker.

minerva looked up to me as if to say 'there is a whole other universe under there that we don't know about.' she sat back down and watched the hole for him to come back out but he never did.

wait, i should start at the beginning.

this is not a dramatization. i was washing dishes like a good househusband when all of a sudden this crazy white and black bug scuttled out from a crack between the floor and the cupboard. i thought it looked rather bizarre so i went to grab minerva, the closest living thing. when i set her down to watch the mayhem she merely blinked a few times and then spat up some viscous grey substance. i let her get her bearings and sure enough, a few seconds later she noticed the little fucker. due to all the commotion, fucker there went and slipped back under the cupboard. at this point minerva and i were simply astounded.

but what i said at the beginning... was a lie. while minerva was looking up at me, pondering aloud the universe beneath, fucker came back out of the cupboard. it hit me: this thing totally looks like a parasite. well, what you'd see under a telescope. maybe i shouldn't be letting my smallanimal near this thing... but no matter! minerva is fucking scared of the thing and jumps away as it bolts into the living room. this thing is fucking fast, you have no idea. it freaked me out in all honesty. i feared for the safety of my kitten, myself and most importantly my house, so i did what any decent man would do: i grabbed a bare paper towel roll and killed the fucker.















also, i had the strangest urge to write a 'did he die on the bus?' story today at work but got bored with the notion. but somehow, i think i lived it out anyway.